I want to follow up a little from yesterday’s post. I spent a lot of time yesterday talking about negative talk, both self-talk and the things we say to others. But what about the positive stuff? What inspires us, or gives us that urge to accomplish something?
For me, it’s the underdog story. The little engine that could, Rocky, that sort of thing. The one who does something they just shouldn’t be able to do. And for myself, having someone not believe I can do something is the torch that lights a fire under me to prove them wrong. I’m stubborn that way.
When I left to join the Air Force at the age of 25 (I was an OLD recruit) I was literally told by one guy I knew that I’d never last through Basic Training. Well, I proved him wrong, I not only made it through Basic, I went on to become Honor Graduate at my Technical Training School, while fighting off a severe case of Bronchitis. I went on to excel at pretty much everything I ever did during the short time I was in the Air Force.
When I started kickboxing at the age of 40, most people figured it was just an exercise class. When they found out I wasn’t doing “cardio kickboxing” but was doing the real deal, complete with sparring, getting punched in the face and eventually stepping into a boxing ring (3 times) they mostly thought I was nuts.
And when I started out, I was BAD at it. I couldn’t throw a decent punch if my life depended on it. But I ended up achieving a Black Belt rank just a month before my 43rd birthday. I wasn’t a natural athlete; I wasn’t graceful or fast. That’s not how I accomplished what I did. I did it by toughing it out; working harder than most. (I trained with teenagers and young men. I was the ONLY woman in our group.)
I found that when you push yourself past the point where you think you HAVE to stop, that’s when amazing things happen. That’s when you find yourself ducking the punch that’s coming at you, and landing an overhand right on a guy 6 feet 2 inches tall and sending him backwards a couple of steps. That’s when you manage to fake out your trainer and catch him off-guard with a roundhouse kick to the head. And those things feel GOOD, because you are a 40+ year old woman who should not be able to do that.
When I lost my last job, back in November of 2008, I did try to get another job, briefly. But then I got started working online, and even though I hadn’t figured it out yet, I knew that I would. So I turned down jobs, even before I was making money. I knew that if I took another full-time job, I would never make this happen. I did work part time for the Census Bureau, but I haven’t had a full -time job in over 3 years. My family thought I was crazy.
My husband always supported me, but I could see doubt in his eyes at times too. It’s hard to keep believing in something you don’t understand.
But I’m the Rocky story. I’ll do it even though I’m not “supposed” to. I’m not young, not technical, and there are a lot of things I don’t know how to do. Sometimes things take me a long time, and I’m not yet in a position to do a lot of outsourcing. I get it wrong. Probably more often than I know.
But I keep working. I stay up all night to get my product launch off. I answer every single email that a subscriber sends me. I try my best to really provide something valuable and help people.
So yes, even though I have fallen into the negative self-talk at times (like I mentioned yesterday) I know that I will win the fight. I’m Rocky, sometimes beaten up but never beaten. I’m the little engine that could; pulling a big engine’s load up the hill. I’m just an ordinary, middle-aged woman, who can accomplish extraordinary things.
You could hear the Rocky theme playing couldn’t you? I know I could.
Now having said all of that, I did NOT do a video today. I really was going to, but I spent most of the day working on something to give my affiliates to send to their lists. Then I got started trying to use my Camtasia, and figured out that it’s going to take me a couple of tries probably, and that is after I watch a few videos on what to do. Opening up that software and looking at the controls, I felt like someone was asking me to drive a space ship without a manual.
I will figure it out though. Because I CAN do video.